Help me out here – I’m starting a collection of the amusing and vaguely abusive things that linguists say about each other.
There is, of course, the well-known armchair linguist, Homo sapiens linguisticus sedilensis.
The opposite of the armchair linguist (if one can have opposites in biological phylogeny) is the safari linguist, Homo sapiens linguisticus safariensis – the analogy of the big game hunter is obvious and needs no explanation.
The third subspecies is the drive-by typologist, who I guess is Homo sapiens linguisticus praeteragitor. The drive-by typologist is noted for the hit-and-run looking up of examples in grammars. They grab the loot and run with it.
Can anyone add to the collection? What have you been called? What do you hurl at your disliked colleagues in faculty meetings? Can we reconstruct the phylogeny of the subspecies H. sapiens linguisticus? Don’t know any other terms? Make them up! Some of my best friends are phonologists, and I think they have got off too lightly thus far. A free bottle of dihydrous oxide to the best submission.